


i shall say goodnight till it be morrow

by orphan_account



Category: BLACKPINK (Band)
Genre: F/F, Post-Zombie Apocalypse, death mentions
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-12
Updated: 2017-11-12
Packaged: 2019-02-01 05:40:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,797
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12698493
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Before Jisoo Turns, her last thought is of Lalisa, and that is everything.





	i shall say goodnight till it be morrow

**Author's Note:**

> i wasn't sure how to tag this because since jisoo is just turning into a zombie, she doesn't technically die on screen. so i didn't tag for mcd but they do talk about it a lot, so. that's how it is.

Jisoo recognizes the symptoms before she even realizes that she was scratched. 

Adrenaline and pain have a long, complicated history. Most of the time, Jisoo doesn’t even feel pain, until the situation is long, long over. She has fought too long and too hard to notice it immediately, unless she’s outright bleeding, buckets and buckets of blood. 

So it makes sense that she notices the fact that she’s losing time, first. The way she begins sleepwalking, sometimes going around the base for hours until Lalisa notices that she’s gone from their bed and gets up to fetch her back. The fact that food begins to taste less appetizing, even while there is a hungry gnawing at the pit of her stomach. 

It’s only when she’s changing shirts--something that, in this utterly ravaged world, only happens after weeks at a time--that she sees the tiny, almost completely healed scratch. It’s a soft pink, and when pressed upon aggressively, only the traces amount of pain can be felt. 

It’s such a small thing, too, the end of Jisoo’s life. 

But Jisoo knows what this means. The scratch means that everything is over. The scratch means that she is dead, and there’s no hope for her. If Jisoo had been bitten, the change would have been instantaneous. But because it was just a scratch, now she’s cursed to wait. 

Jisoo knows that she doesn’t have much time left. That she has until not much longer after the scratch is healed. So she does what she wants most in the world, which is go to Lalisa, and tell her everything. 

Jisoo is unsure how to tell her. Lalisa is so, so lovely. Even lovelier when she looks up and smiles at Jisoo’s presence. If there was anything that made this world worth it, that made living through the Sickness that created the half dead half living creatures that had stolen much of the earth, it was Lalisa. 

“Lis,” Jisoo tries, and she can hear the way her voice trembles and shakes around Lalisa’s name. “I have to tell you something. Because I can’t just walk away from you without telling you what’s wrong and why I’m doing this.” 

Lalisa stops moving completely at that. She goes utterly still, and just the sight of that, of the half smile on Lalisa’s face, of the way that she’s turned to stone, makes Jisoo even more scared than she was already. 

“What is it?” Lalisa asks, and Jisoo can see in her eyes that she’s trying to be so, so brave. 

“I’m.” At this, Jisoo has to stop and take a deep breath. She doesn’t want to cry yet. She doesn’t want to cry at all, because there’s a part of her that wants to stay strong for Lalisa, who is only a few years younger, but still somehow so good and pure at heart. The world hasn’t tainted Lalisa yet, or made her weary, even after all the things they’ve seen together. Jisoo doesn’t want to be the reason that Lalisa uses that. Jisoo wants Lalisa to continue being how she is, whether or not Jisoo is in the picture. 

So Jisoo curls her and around Lalisa’s, and tries again. “I’m Turning,” Jisoo says finally. “I can feel it. And today, when I was changing, I noticed a scratch.” 

“But the scratch could be from anything,” Lalisa tries, positive until the end. “From anything, unnie. Just last week, we were out getting firewood, maybe some of the wood scratched you? Or-” 

“Lalisa,” Jisoo says, and there’s a finality to her voice. There’s a finality in everything she does now. It’s the worst. She squeezes Lalisa’s hand. “I can feel it,” she says. “Soon, very soon, I’m going to Turn, and there’s nothing you, or anybody, could do for me.” 

“But, what about Jennie? She’s the most skilled healer in the camps. And even Chaeyoung, she was infected with the Sickness, but didn’t change, so she’s immune-”

“Chaeyoung might be immune, but I’m not.” Jisoo tries to smile, but it’s so hard. Jisoo doesn’t want to smile and die, she wants to cry, and she wants to live. “I can feel it, Lalisa.” 

“But,” Lalisa tries again. She’s definitely crying now, her entire face contorting with it. “No. Unnie, you can’t, you can’t, Jisoo, you can’t.” 

“I can,” Jisoo tells her, and then they both start to cry.

*

“What do you want to do?” Lalisa asks, as they’re lying in bed. She’s just been staring at Jisoo this whole time, drinking her in, playing lightly with the ends of her hair. It’s a light day, and their small bunkering is stifling, but Jisoo can’t think of a place that she’d rather be right now, Lalisa and their bed the only things that she wants. “For your...for your last day, what do you want?” 

“I want to have dinner with you, and Chaeyoung, and Jennie. And then I would like to take a nice, hot shower. And then I would like to not die.” 

Lalisa smiles a bit at that, like she knows Jisoo needs someone to at least attempt to be amused by her jokes. “I think I can do two out of those three things. I can make them happen. With or without me, of course.” 

“With you, always, Lalisa. Always with you.” 

“Unnie,” Lalisa says. “Jisoo, I. I always want to be with you too.” 

“I know.” Jisoo reaches out and strokes Lalisa’s soft hair. She wishes she could say something trite about how she’s always going to be with Lalisa, no matter what, but she can’t. She can’t. It would be a lie, because even if someone’s spirit is out in the world, when you’re a physical body, you want a physical body beside you. The idea of a person is never, ever enough. It would not be enough for Jisoo, and it certainly will not be enough for Lalisa. “I know.” 

*

Dinner with Chaeyoung and Jennie is like something out of a dream. Lalisa is vague, just telling them that they want them to come over and share some of the contraband they have left over from the last raid in the city, and they eat all of it until Jisoo’s stomach is hurting. Nothing tastes particularly appealing, but she forces some of it down, as to not alarm her friends. 

Jennie seems to notice something is off. Her gaze lingers over Jisoo eating the chocolate, at the way that Jisoo sits so close to Lalisa, but she doesn’t say anything before she and Chaeyoung move to leave. 

That night, as they’re hugging goodbye, Jennie squeezes Jisoo extra tight. “I love you,” Jennie says. “Okay? I love you. You’re my best friend.” 

“I love you too. And Chaeyoung as well.” 

“I know.” Jennie smiles, and it’s sad. She laces fingers with Chaeyoung. “I do. Goodbye.” 

*

Lalisa is the one that pulls Jisoo into the bath house at two in the morning, after waking her up. “Come on,” she says. “I’ve been boiling water, and now you can have a hot bath.” 

The water feels wonderful, but Jisoo knows from experience that it will cool soon. So she strips herself and watches as Lalisa does the same, and they sink into it together. 

“This is such a waste of water,” Jisoo says, luxuriating in the warmth against her skin, while she still can. She won’t be able to feel anything at all, once she’s Turned. 

“I know. But I figure, what will this matter to you, when you’re gone?” 

“What is that supposed to mean?” Lalisa doesn’t look at Jisoo when she straightens up and reaches out for her, after not answering. “Lalisa.” 

“It means. I don’t know what it means. I just don’t want to be left behind, unnie. I don’t want you to leave me here, by myself. And I’m sorry, I know I’m being selfish telling you about this at all, but it’s true. It’s all I can think about.” 

“No matter what happens to me,” Jisoo tells her, “my feelings won’t change, okay? Please know that. Even when I die, my love for you will keep existing. It’ll float in the air, or whatever, like toxins. Even if I dissipate, they’ll still exist. I want you to know that. That’s how much I love you. Do you get it?” 

“I’ll try.” 

*

When Jisoo wakes up the next morning, she gently shakes Lalisa awake. 

She watches as Lalisa wakes up slowly, her eyebrows furrowed before her entire face smooths out, the way she yawns as her eyes flutter open. Even at a time like this, something so mundane, something that Jisoo had seen even before the end of the world, she makes something in Jisoo’s chest twist. 

“I’m going to go now,” she tells her softly, voice barely a whisper, like her body doesn’t want to say this at all. God, she doesn’t want to say it. “I’m going to start walking, and get as far away from here as I can, okay? But I love you.” 

“I love you too, unnie. Let me walk with you some of the way?” 

Jisoo hesitates, but she allows herself to be selfish this one last time. “Okay,” Jisoo tells her, and helps Lalisa out of bed. 

*

The sun is just rising as Lalisa and Jisoo start their walk. Grass crunches underneath their feet, the sky has only the barest traces of clouds, all pastel oranges and yellows and pinks. The air is cool, so early in the morning. Ultimately, it seems to be the beginning of a perfect day. 

No matter what happens to the world, the earth always manages to continue to be so beautiful. Jisoo doesn’t know whether or not she feels hopeful about that, now that she’s at the end of her time here. She doesn’t know what to feel at all. 

So she just continues to walk with Lalisa, holding her hand, soaking in as much of this as she can. 

Eventually, she knows that there’s a point where she has to continue on alone. So she stops, and pulls Lalisa closer to her. She kisses Lalisa just once, the way she had last night before they had slept, having sex one last time. They had fallen asleep a mess of sweaty limbs, and Jisoo finds herself being so grateful to have had that, this final time. 

“I love you, and always will. Remember that,” Jisoo tells her, pressing their foreheads together. 

“I will,” Lalisa says. 

For a moment, they stand together, the sun rising slowly behind them. And then Jisoo has to pull back. 

“Goodbye,” Jisoo says, and then she is alone. 

“Goodbye,” Lalisa says, and watches her go. 

*

Before Jisoo Turns, her last thought is of Lalisa, and that is everything.


End file.
